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For the Girl Who is Afraid of her Future, Read This:

12/21/2018

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Picture
Photo by: Johan Erik Lallerstedt

​The unknown can be a scary thing, and I think that's what we fear most. Not knowing where we'll be in five years, five months, five days, heck, even five minutes. How do we get to where we want to be? If we even know where that is? We might have an idea, and man it might sound like a dream come true, but is that possible? Gosh. Where do I go from here?

If I would rather live my life traveling the world and writing books about my adventures, teaching yoga through my own phone application, learning new languages and about people from different places, and sharing my art and soul to those willing to listen...is that practical? Would my family approve? How would I survive? How would I make money? Where do I even start something like that? Worst of all...what if I fail? Do I stop trying to achieve that dream life? Do I instead go for that 9-5 job where I know I'll have a stable living, but never actually having the life I want? The answer is: time isn't guaranteed - life can be taken away from you at any moment, so why wouldn't you use what moments you have doing what excites you compared to doing what you believe others' think is right? Just breath. 

Chances are, they'll be equally as excited for you if you tell them what you want to do, and if you have some sort of idea on how you want to get there. If they're not happy for you, who cares? Find a way to open your mind and go for it anyway. 

The unknown is an exciting place. Each moment into the future is a part of your journey. Who knows what will happen? Maybe you'll meet someone today who will suggest that,  "Hey, have you ever thought of singing?", or perhaps come across an old book in the library that has a forgotten letter inside, which maybe will lead to your next story? What's even more fun though, is that if you spend each of these days doing what makes you happy and spending this time taking one more step towards where you want to be (or where you think you want to be) your life will ultimately be that more fulfilling. If your biggest wish in life is to be happy, it goes along the lines of the saying, "life is a journey, not a destination," - if you're  doing something each day that makes your heart smile, your life will be a happy one compared to the wish of it being a byproduct of what you hope will be a good life. What I mean by this is: don't date that guy just because "he's got the qualities that every other girl would love, he will definitely treat me right and I'll have a happy life" - if it's not what you love, don't force yourself into a relationship where you don't feel something. Same goes for giving your time towards something that truly doesn't speak to you. 

Also, if you're spending your nights home after a long day of work, continuing the work of a job that doesn't fulfill you - quit it. If you'd rather be reading, or writing - painting, or maybe refurbishing that dresser that you found at the dump - do that instead! Create space or a business for yourself that will allow you to take a leap towards what you want your life to become.  Life is made up of the moments and how you spend them - not how you wish you had used them with the outcome you only imagined. Life won't change unless you do. Have an open mind, open heart, and always believe in the possibilities of a better tomorrow. 

The biggest and most important part of this life is to be true to yourself and understand the gifts you've been given. It doesn't matter what others think. Get that out of your head. Listen to yourself. Ask yourself the question, "What is it that I was put on this earth to do? How can I impact just one person at least, through who I am and who I want to be? What am I good at? What absolutely sets my heart on fire to the point of tears? How can I make that my life?" Take into consideration how the things you love make you feel. How do you feel? Picture yourself in that life and understand that it is absolutely a possibility to live that life - just as long as you take action towards it. Be realistic - and with that, I mean be realistic in your goals. You can't become a master chef in a day, or a week - things take time, but understand if you take action every single day, that life is much more possible and a million more times likely to happen - sometimes in a way you wouldn't expect.

Just like the saying, "You miss 100 of the shots you don't take," you're not going to win a Grammy if you never sing your song and put yourself out there. Just like if you have an idea for a book, but never write it. It will always just be an idea if you never sit down and do the work. The universe won't make its magic unless you take action and tell it to.

Take it. Take the life you want, don't expect it to be given to you. 

Don't let fear overcome you, especially the fear of failure. It's one of life's greatest teachers, and it actually moves you forward to where you want to be faster if you think about it. You just have to embrace the friend that failure truly is. It tells you what's not working, and if you ask for feedback - it tells you where you went wrong, so you're able to move forward without making that same mistake - just as long as you keep moving forward. That's the key. Also know, nothing has to to be permanent. If it doesn't feel right, don't stay. That's not to say that if something doesn't work, give up, it means, if you thought something would be one way, and it's doing you more harm than good, or it's not what you were expecting - spend your time trying something else. You won't move forward if you're staying in the same place for no purpose. 

There is never a clear path on how to achieve your dreams, but as long as you lean into opportunity, think of what makes you happy, and truly go for it with all of the confidence in the world - you can never say you didn't try and chances are, you'll be living the life beyond what you dreamed. Everything takes time. Your life is constantly under construction. It may look ugly sometimes, and you're unsure of what's actually underway, but know you have the ability to build something beautiful with it and things aren't always what they seem from an exterior point of view. Don't analyze it too much. Trust your gut, your soul, and just go for it - one building block at a time. You'll thank yourself in the end and see every day was an accomplishment.

Take your time. Breath. Enjoy each moment and take it in as it passes - making the most of it. 

There's nothing to be afraid of besides not allowing yourself the chance to live the life you've always dreamed of.


As Jim Carey said, "I learned many great lessons from my father, not the least of which, was that you can fail at what you don’t want so you might as well take a chance on doing what you love”

and

“Life opens up opportunities to you, and you either take them or you stay afraid of taking them.”


Go for it, lady Jane. I have faith in you, and you should have faith in you, too. 
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